Ages one and up

I tried to be kind
I tried to be good
I tried to give you all that I could

I fought and I cried
I begged and I pleaded
but what I could give,
was less than you needed

You littered your legs
with valleys and trenches
you covered it up with
camouflage and with fences

There comes a time
when the pen's out of ink
and all you can see is your
blood covered sink

And so you sink.
Lower and lower.
Returning to carving.
Over and over.

I gave you all that I could
which sure wasn't much
but just like my foot,
I slipped off the clutch

Which killed it fast
but I killed you slow
I'd prefer the shit car
That's the way to go

Fast and easy, no more pain
you want to give in,
but you have to refrain

For Hell cannot win when
Heaven's the goal
you have to push back
when push starts to pull

"One year sober" chants in your mind
each morning you're up
and back to the grind

Counting the seconds
to the next nap
cause at least when you sleep
Hell can't attack

"Take this one, take that one.
Something will work!"
You think you know
cause it says 'Doc' on your shirt?

Well you don't, I'm sorry to say
you haven't been here before
you've never felt this way

Don't say, "Some have it worse,
you should be happy!"
If I could, don't you think
I'd change what's inside me?

You keep walking
cause no one else gets it
you see the mold
but you'll never fit it

So every day you slap on that smile
you go to war
to convince yourself you're worth while

Maybe one day
it'll all be different
but to pretend nothing's wrong
now that's just plain ignorant

Although it's not easy
my friends, don't give in
hold on to hope, hope you can win

This disease may have you bound tight
but remember Christ is your friend
He is the light

He's felt your aches, your pains
your tears and your fears
when it's too much for you
offer it up in your prayers

"Don't give up on me, buddy
there's so much in store
I promise this isn't forever
I promise there's more."

As in "Calvin and..."

Smarter than me,
the shake of your shoulders
eased my overpowering
inadequacies.

Jesus was a cool dude.
He's going to love you 
no matter what,
but irrepressibly, so will I.
Provoked by ink,
professing your beautiful array of 
character.

It's a gift to feel so much, 
but when it seems to overtake,
never forget
there is no spoon.
So hold on tight,
take the red pill,

live a little

NEVERLAND

Who shot down the Wendy bird?
My first and last
I would never
Yet somehow this
Lost Boy
was singled out

Banished and never to return,
was his sentence
A punishment worse than
death

Though forever he held to his
faith and trust
inside he turned to
ashes and dust

When he returned,
she had grown up
Broken her promise
forgot how to fly

She can't keep you

no buttons
no thimbles

You were always my happy thought
I drank poison for you

To die would be an awfully big adventure
Death is the only adventure you have left







x__Nope___

your turn

damn your beauty
damn your mind

you pulled from me my last ounce of
strength
liquified by lost hope
escaping through a glossy view

a view of a spyglass
so focused
that the rest of the world was
black
ignored
unimportant
nonexistent

The Lonely Line

Pains.

Panes,
my eyes, the window to my soul.
Drenched.
Rains.

Seek, and ye shall find.
Never your Mind.
It's all been mined.
Raped of independent thought and feeling.
Desperate to escape the lonely line.
Clocks tick by,
calendars fly.
For now, with myself, I must abide.

“Be yourself- not your idea of what you think somebody else's idea of yourself should be.” - Henry David Thoreau

Silver Sonata

Silver Sonata.

Cracked and dinged,

Cluttered and busy.

Missing pieces.

Loosely held together by adhesives that would not last forever.  

But when it appeared above the curve of the earth, the solo of it rolling along became the song of which he fell in love. It the star, the true talent, he simply wanted to be a quiet accompanist. 

He was, for a time, until the performer no longer had need for the background noise. 

Like any machine, it needed repair. Returning from the shop with a never before seen shine. 

New parts.

New paint.

Refurbished. 

Carefully restored.

As if it were a collectors item, it was hidden away. 

A glimpse not even allowed to Its fondest admirer.